On April 8, I deactivated my Facebook account. Have I found other ways to procrastinate? Ohhh, yes. Do I miss Facebook? Not really.
I almost feel guilty about how much I don't miss Facebook, like I dropped a lot of friends and don't care. In fact, Facebook is great at trying to guilt you out when you deactivate your account. "So-and-so will miss you," they say, and maybe some people believe them.
Okay, I did get an email today from somebody who said she missed seeing me on Facebook. I doubt most people have noticed I left, or would have noticed if they hadn't heard from me. But that's the kind of obsessive "is so-and-so missing me? thinking about me? ever recalling my existence if I'm not forcing it on them?" weakness that I was trying to back away from by deactivating the account. It's also an example of how the people who want to contact you will find ways to contact you.
This morning I logged in to look up a few email addresses and AIM handles. I scrolled through my five pages of "friends" to see if I needed info on them. I almost wrote down a few email addresses and then stopped myself, thinking, "s/he would probably be weirded out to get an email from me. " And although I know there is plenty of room in this world for casual friendships, and people you don't see on a regular basis but enjoy seeing when you do meet, I don't know that I want to have casual friendships via internet, yet one more step removed from intentionality. Especially not with those people I share a city with. I know that for me it is a comfortable copout to inquire after people on Facebook when I brush past them in church hallways with barely any eye contact.
Will I be a regular Facebook user again someday? I'm not as sure that I will as I once was. Certainly not as enthusiastic about it. It feels kind of like a trap I escaped. I have considered the possibility of reactivating someday and deleting all of the people I see on a regular basis, along with the people I don't see but feel weird enough contacting even via a social networking site. We'll see.
All of which is starting to remind me of something I wrote last September:
Computer screens
Telephones
Instant
Convenient
Our lives in degrees of separation
I try to fit you into my schedule
When and where and how I want you
But secretly I like it when
You burst into my life
Whether or not it works for me
4 comments:
*I* miss seeing you on Facebook! :)
I ABSOLUTELY miss seeing you on Facebook...I didn't say anything before because I didn't want to guilt you into coming back...and respect your choice! But I DO! I DO MISS YOU!
I also miss seeing you on Facebook but respect whatever you decide to do.
Okay, seriously, for once I wasn't actually compliment-fishing there. Thanks, guys. I'll come back for you eventually. :)
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